I have heard it said that worrying is practical atheism. I get that. If God is all-loving, all-good and all-powerful, then what do I have to worry about? I should trust him wholeheartedly with the affairs of my life.
But I always come back to this -- what about my screw-ups? Sin has consequences, and if lack of discipline is a sin, then believe me, I've racked up a lot of consequences. I have eaten what I love for over two decades without serious regard for the health benefits or lack thereof. I have not exercised with any regularity. I have given my children what I thought was reasonable and right whether or not I could afford it. These are the things I worry about. Mostly the last one. I worry about money.
Why do we have books (even the Christian bookstore is full of them) on the right way to manage your money, the right way to raise your children, the right way to plan your future, the right way to care for your body, the right way to choose a career, the right way to buy a house -- unless there is also a wrong way? Presumably doing those things the wrong way has consequences. I worry about the consequences.
I believe God can take care of the practical details of my life. I guess the unbelief comes in with regard to me. Can God -- will God -- keep me from screwing up my life? I have seen some Christians' lives in pretty big messes. He seems to let us do quite a bit of damage before intervening.
Worry equals infidelity. I have to trust God with me. I have to trust him to mold me and change me and give me the practical wisdom I need to live my life. I have to trust that he is big enough for my mistakes. I have to trust that there is redemption. I have to trust God with me.
God has been working on this one in my life. Interesting as I have prayed for God to trust Him more, sometimes the worry increases. I am forced to further explore His promises about His unfailing care for me, forced to pray repeatedly for the peace which surpasses all understanding, and then it hits me. God is working through my worry, moving me into closer proximity to Him through my "Careful Infidelity". "Hallelujah grace like rain falls down on me, and all my sins are washed away".
ReplyDeleteI think that being aware of the consequences of your own sin is proof that the Holy Spirit is working in you. As I've matured in my faith I become aware of sin in my life that I may not have considered sin when I was younger. I think as a christian when I get into trouble it is because I become deaf and blind to God when he is pointing out the consequences. Just being aware that there are consequences to my actions keeps me out of a lot of trouble. If I screw up I have to ask God's forgiveness, trust in his grace and ask for strength to not keep repeating the same behavior. In some areas I fail more then once, but from that I gain wisdom and endurance. Endurance because the consequences still remain. If God takes away the consequences would I be compelled to change?
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